Patterson In Paris Debacle

Posted: August 30, 2012 in Crime Writers
Tags: , , ,

James-Patterson-Crimezine

Something bad is happening out there…Something very bad…

To see the latest Patterson tome you would think the J. Walter Thompson veteran and crime thriller master is losing his golden touch. The man who coined the phrase Toys R Us Kid has “teamed up” with Michael Ledwidge to come out with the snappily named ZOO.

Now as regular readers of Crimezine and the great Patersoni will know, the worlds most successful end of isle author is very fond of naming his bad guys after furry creatures—the Weasel, the Tiger, the Badger, the Oscelot, etc, so one can only assume that in this new tome we will meet the entire Faustian menagerie of Pattersonian villains in one mega-market sized volume.

Phew! It will undoubtedly be an unputdownable thrill-ride rollercoaster of a novel that will have you turning pages like your fingers are plugged into a Colombian drug cartel currency counter. But what’s this? The book has a plot!!!!

Jackson Oz, a young biologist, witnesses a “coordinated” lion ambush in Africa, the enormity of the violence to come is terrifying. With the help of ecologist Chloe Tousignant, Oz races to warn world leaders before it’s too late. The attacks are growing in ferocity, cunning, and planning, and soon there will be no place left for humans to hide.

Yikes! The creatures of Madagascar take over the world! Runnnnnnnnn!

For added hilarity the Patterson camp has compared this novel to Stephen King at his very best. Really? After all the Patterson/King spats? YGTBFG right?

Now we realize this novel isn’t exactly Crimezine fodder, in fact some may argue that Patterson has cruelly, deliberately, and with malice of forethought stopped writing crime novels just to spite us, but fear not Crimeziners, when Jimbo taunts us with a line like: Something bad is happening out there…Something very bad, it would be sheer bad manners for us not to pass comment. Have a crimetastic weekend Y’all.

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